Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts

Sunday, November 2, 2008

A Dose of Fairytale...

and a big slap in life.

Reality is harsh and life is tough sometimes.. and thats when I turn to another dose of the fairytale tonight..just to have a big slap to my face at the same time.

Unlike most who wanted to be Cinderella, I had always wanted to be Tinkerbell (not the hand carry luggage version of Paris Hilton's ugly chihuahua). I love her for being petite, and vain like myself *blush* I love her attitude, her style, her being a spoilt brat, and most of all, her magic dust. It's Tinkerbell - Peter Pan's Tinkerbell, geddit?


NOT this (Eew.. no freaking way i wanted to be that poor thing!) :




















but this.. ^_^:

























and my childhood hero had always been Peter Pan. I wanna go with Peter everywhere in Neverland, play with the Lost Boys and make fun of Hook and Captain Smee.. oh, I really do love love love Peter Pan..

Yet here I am, today, realising what a big mistake it had been.

I realized I had always been Tinkerbell all around.. I had always wanted to be with Peter and completely wept out Wendy from my own version of Peter Pan story.. I had always have this tale of Peter Pan and Tinkerbell without Wendy.. and yet I woke up every now and then, and realised that there wasn't just Peter and Tinks, there is also Wendy..as in, Peter & Wendy.

and Tinkerbell, she just had to give way..

She's jealous. She's angry and dissapointed. She lost her magic dust power. She lost her charm, weak and lifeless.. sad and lonely... and she's dying inside. She lived on.. but she never really knows how to carry on, she shrugged and fell, stand again and again she fell.. that's when she decides to take her sweet time to cry her heart out.



"Do you believe in fairies? I do! I do!"


But she found the encouragement, the faith and support she needed... and she tried hard again to stand up.. weak and wobbly at first, but she will have to keep trying, with all the faith from the kids all round the world.. they belive in fairies.. they do.. they do.. They believe in her. They have faith in her. And she knows she has to be strong again, not only for herself, but also for the people who have so much faith in her.. have so much love for her.


With this, I just want to say thank you to every single one of you who has been so encouraging and supportive during my darkest period.. and I promise you, I will be a better person, and as for Tinkerbell, I will let her stay in my childhood memories. I will grow up and close all the Neverland chapters in my life..



Goodbye Neverland, Goodbye Peter.

and take care, Tinkerbell..




Friday, October 10, 2008

Starting over, 26

I was my oldself
' Twas my life before today
Dissapointed, sad, lonely, suicidal and fed up.
Waking up at nightime, sleeping by day.

I hated the sun
I hated everyone
I hated kids
I hated weekends

I hated everything
I hated him. I hated him the most I would cursed him as long as I live
I hated his new girlfriend I would murder her if I ever met her
I hated the thoughts that we were in love before
I hated the thoughts of him and his every words
I HATED every single thing in the world


but I decided it has to end somewhere

and so..

This is me
This is my blog
This is my journey starting over at 26
This is the promise I made to myself

To live again, to love and believe in myself again, and to once again, be strong.
This is my story of letting go, starting fresh and loving myself
All over again.

This is my new beginning.